Normal

Saturday Pancakes

So Saturday we had a little bit of normal. Found a pancake mix with no milk or gluten. Our pancake weekend breakfast is back. And none to soon. It has been quite a change for all of us. I don't remember ever going three weeks without cooking something premade and frozen. The boys seam to like the new foods we have been trying, but still haven't found a milk substitute they both like.
Marlen's terned out to be the place to be. I love that store. They even make a soy sausage James likes. Now if I can just convince him to keep eating this healthier way I will be thrilled. Have one and a half months to convince him. At least in the end I will no longer buy premade food with all the preservatives and all. He can't argue with that. And if the boys can have wheat and milk again we can still keep a heather diet and the gluten at a minimum. So in the end it is so much better for us all even if I had to be forced into it I like this new way of things in our home. James even mad salsa with the kids. All fresh veggies and they loved the time with there dad. Vary cool

Sarcasm in Bloom

So yesterday I reluctantly cleaned my bathrooms. Not my favorite job, but well it has to be done. My little Nathen in all his joy watched Mommy scrub away and on occasion made a grab for a spay bottle to help. In witch I reply. "Don't touch it will make u sick" It is after saying this about three times and him pulling his hand away that on the fourth he simply smiled reached out and "Touched" the bottle with one finger. My mothers curs has come true. I have a kid "just like me"

Home for the 4Th

The 4Th of July has been in debate at our house for some time. I wanted James home and he wanted to work. Yes we need the money and things are slow at work so I see his side, but I don't care. I want him home to help me blow things up.

So long story short. I WIN! James took the day off. We went out to lunch with his sister and then off to her house at the lake. Aside from putting up with Her and her DH making little snide remarks at each other and Cort wanting to do anything but play with his little cousins we had a great time. The kids had a wonderful time with bottle rockets. The older once would set them off and the younger once would chase after the sticks. And in true boy fashion Cort did this tell his finger blistered. And once the darkness hit we all got to see a wonderful show put on by the neighbors around the lake. First year we didn't buy any our self. It was loud and bright and a wonderful time.

Today we slept in, I cleaned the bathrooms and finished cleaning out my food supply. Now I just have to shop so the boys have something to eat. Niki and Lory have been such an asset with this hole allergy thing. So now I go threw the debate in my head weather to shop today or put it off tell tomorrow. mmmm tuffy.

And the Rain came down

Today we finished the boys playroom/classroom. and with all the rain they will be putting it to good use.

We also got to the library today and made Planispheres. It was fun, but the man giving the class was a bit more into the stares then all the kids. We do now have a cool way to examine the stars. Just have to go were we can see them.

Hope we ahve some sun tomarrow. Need to send the kids out so I can cleen the floors. mmm maybe I'll put it off.

Just on of thous days

should say one of thous weeks. I am just tired. Past the stage of wanting to cry at the drop of a hat, now I am numb. I don't know witch is worse. There is this acing under the numbness I can't put my finger on. A feeling of hopelessness. Feels so bleak and I never know when it is going to end. Last time it was only a weak, but before that it was four months. I don't miss the anger or sadness it is not being happy about anything. I can fake it with the best of them, but then I feel empty for doing it. Like I am lying to my family and friends. I just don't want them to feel bad just because I can't feel good. It normally takes a change of something. I moved the hole house around and it wasn't enough. I am going to change my vitamin intake. that helps some times an exercise more that helps too. It is just so hard to think strait rite now. It all feels so hopeless. The worst of it is I know it herts my kids. All I want to do is get away. To not be near any one. I isolate myself and the kids end up isolated too.
Maybe it is just the stress getting to me. James working all the time and we still have no money. I don't get it. How did this happen? I hate being broke. I hate him not being home and working so hard just to brake even at the end of the month. There has to be something better. I feel guilty for not working, but know I can't send the boys to school. It just isn't rite. SO James pays the price. Heck we all do. There has to be an answer. I just don't know and rite now have no energy to fined it.

To better days

Congrats to Trevor

Devon, Trevor and Nathen
Trevors Graduation from Kindergarten

Trevor last day of school

Teacher Mrs. deVrease, Trevor and Justen

We are now free to do as we please

Truly a Women

I started off yesterday in a bad mood having only found out the day before My MIL and Mathew would be coming to stay the night and the house was a mess. I clean the floors and dusted. Did our normal daily thing. Went to pizza hut for lunch then off to the are port to pick up Mom and Matt. James ashered me I would not have to make lunch for them or dinner. I had to do booth. We left at five thirty to head out to Kennedy's Talent show. The highlight of the day.

My spirits raised as all the kids were so cute. Kennedy is in 6Th grade and in the short time I have not seen her has terned into a beautiful young women. As she stood on stage I was amassed how pretty she was and that she is most certainly not the little girl I picture in my head when I think of her. She held the mic low and looked out at the audience, probably looking for her mom and dad, and as the music started nerves got the better of her. She whispered "Shit" for all to hear as the mic picked it up. Her face red and trying not to giggle she started to sing. She was lovely. I couldn't be prouder. Most definitely the highlight of the night.

Hand on u

My latest pic Took while Nathen was nursing.

Tattoo

We had lodes of fun at Graham's birthday party. Devon didn't want to take a bath for two days because he wanted to keep his Tattoos. I told him we had pics so he can take a bath now.

Mud Mountan Dam

This is Mud Mountain Dam. We got to go there Friday with Trevor's school field trip.
Way Fun!!
View at the bottom of the trail

This is the view from the top.

Here is the trail. Lots of stares

They have four parks there. Trevor only knows how to climb on top of the monkey bars.

After all our fun.

Emergency Room

<------- Nathens mended Noggen---













Last night while getting ready for bed Nathen slipped in the bathroom and smashed his head on the corner of the door. I rushed the boys out of the tub, but with James home he sent me and Nathen to the hospital and put the boys to bed.

I have to admit I was glad James was there for the initial shock. All I saw was blood and my breath leaving my body. Filled with gilt for letting this happen I sat in the emergency room waiting for them to see us. Nathen was great. Other then not wanting me to wipe the blood from his head he was happy as can be and playing with all the other injured patients waiting. (Who strangely were all there for there own reason, but lived on the same street as one another)

So to let u know after three hours Nathens head was glued together and he is fine. I am a very tired Mom and doing my best today not to be grumpy and short with the kids.

Oddly mostly mad at myself and James. Me for letting my baby get hurt and at James for doing nothing while I was at the hospital. He put the boys to bed and sat and plaid his game, So when I came home wanting to put Nathen to bed and relax with him. I instead had to put away dinner, run the dish washer, clean the blood from the bathroom were Nathen got hurt and straiten up the living room so it would be clean in the morning when Tami drops of Shelby. Instead of relaxing with James he had to pack his bag for work and make his lunch. I get so tired of being the only one who takes care of the house. At lease we are all in good health for the most part.

Been Thinking

I know my head still Hertz.

Any how. Just wishing I had a better camera. Have an idea for a photo display and well my camera sucks. I need to get permission from friends too. It will not be there hole self, but parts of self's. Hands mostly. I love hands. Any how it is a woke in progress and only in my head.

I would like to have a big get together with every one and let the kids go art crazy. Buy one of thous big roils of paper and let them use there hands and feet to paint. Then just throw them in the sprinkler to wash off. I guess that one more thing to work on.

I do plan to take random photos and see what comes of it. I do get a good shot from time to time. I also like solutes pics, but have no idea how to do them. Will have to do some test. Just wish my camera would not be so temperamental and work when I want it too. mmmm to dream.

Well good weak for the most part. Kids are still in one peace. Put together there pre school portfolios seam happy with them. I still have to do Nathen's baby book, but have to wait on buying more photo paper.

Niki and the kids came over for the night. That was fun. I hope they have as much fun here as we have with them here. Always worry they are going to get board. Really do like having them around. And have to get brave and head out to there place more. Probably think I am avoiding it, but really I am just lazy when it comes to the drive.

Oh and They brought the coolest craft. the boys loved it. I'll have to take pics. there are really neat little wooden toys.

So no fireworks, but a good weak. Just hope it is my allergy's making me sick rite now and not a cold. I hate to make them sick.

Crash Dream

Music is playing, kids are singing, baby is sleeping.
The lite is red.
Stopped
A crash, movement, spinning, another crash we stop
The baby is crying, kids are screaming
The music keeps playing
Light are flashing, voices are calling
Kid are yelling, the baby is crying
The music keeps playing
Smock, voices, unable to move
The kids are yelling, the baby is crying
The music keeps playing
Fire, metal bending, glass braking, voices
My kids are calling, the baby is crying
The music keeps playing
Something worm on my face, water sprays over can't see
Kids are quiet, baby is crying
The music keeps playing
Voices, they took them,
Baby is crying far from me
I am worm, I can see, I am standing
The music keeps playing
Kids are safe, baby is safe
One last breath, I can rest, I am free
The music keeps playing

Inspiration in many forms. Music is the challenge. Here is my Idea. Whether it ends in word or an adaptation of a photo or I may even draw again. It is a start.

It has been so long. I no longer know what I have inside. Hiding from what ever may criticize. It has been to long and I am so looking forward to making the most of what I have in me. My baby will play whether the notes make a song or just a sound he likes. I may be laking in skill, but I will not stop playing

No energy or time

I am very tired witch is an understatement. Someone has sucked the energy out of my body and left me for dead to take care of two kids and get them to bed while dealing with heart burn. Yuck. Times like this I would like James home, but just kidding myself really. All he would do is be on the computer plains his game. I hate who ever invented computer games and the like. Hate isn't even a strong enough word. My luck it would be the same guy who invented spell check witch I can't live with out.

Kids are grate, just need the energy to keep up. It is only 8:30 and I should not be so tired. Part of it is thinking of work. I have five calls to make, plus my training call that's at least 5 1/2 hours of work tomorrow with two winy kids that miss there dad. I love Melaleuca and the stayin home and lovin it team, but am just getting started and used to the hours. I know only good will come of it though. I can always in good conscience do this business and know I am only helping others. So, now the kids call got to go. Thanks for the ear.

copied from Beckie thought it would be nice wast of time

Put an "x" if you have ever done any of the following...
(x) snuck out of the house
(x) gotten lost in your city
(x) saw a shooting star
(x) been to any other countries besides the united states
( ) had a serious injury
(x) gone out in public in your pajamas
( ) flown over a volcano in a helicopter
(x) been on a volcano
(x) kissed a stranger
(x) hugged a stranger
( ) been in a fist fight
( ) been arrested
( ) laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose
( ) pushed all the buttons on an elevator
(x) swore at your parents
(x) been in love
(x) been close to love
(x) been to a casino
( ) been skydiving
( ) broken a bone
( ) been high
( ) skinny-dipped
(x) faked sick
(x) flashed someone
(x) mooned someone
(x) saw a therapist
(x) done the splits
( ) played spin the bottle
( ) gotten stitches
( ) drank a whole gallon of apple juice in less than one hour
(x) bitten someone
( ) been to Niagara Falls
(x) gotten the chicken pox
(x) kissed a member of the same sex
( ) crashed into a friend's car
( ) been to Japan
(x) ridden in a taxi
(x) been dumped
(x) shoplifted
( ) been fired
( ) had a crush on someone of the same sex
(x) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back
( ) gone on a blind date
(x) lied to someone you loved
( ) had a crush on a teacher
( ) celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
( ) been to Europe
(x) slept with a co-worker(work with my hubby)
(x) slept with anyone
(x) been married
( ) gotten divorced
(x) had children
( ) seen someone die
( ) had a close friend die
( ) been to Africa
(x) Driven over 400 miles in one day
(x) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
(x) Been on a plane
( ) Seen the Notebook
(x) Thrown up in a bar
( ) Purposely set a part of myself on fire
(x) Eaten Sushi
(x) Been skiing/snowboarding
( ) Met someone in person from the internet
( ) lost a child
(x) gone to college
( ) graduated college
( ) done hard drugs
(x) tried killing yourself(hence therapy)
(x) fired a gun
(x) purposely hurt yourself
(x) taken painkillers
(x) love someone or miss someone right now
( ) gone or going to summer school
(x) swam a mile
( ) ran a 5K race
(x) played paintball
(x) realized you were w/ the wrong person after it was too late
( ) have no regrets
( ) ate a whole box of girl scout cookies by yourself

thnkas for wasting time with me :)

Born

You Were Actually Born Under:

http://www.quizdiva.net/chinesehoroscopes/snake.gif"> %20color="#000000">Popular and crafty, you are a master at the art of seduction.You are intelligent and intuitive - and make a savvy businessperson.You live life to the fullest, even if it means maxing out your credit cards.Many people are secretly (and hopelessly) in love with you. You are most compatible with a Rooster or Ox.

<><><>You font-size: color:black;>http://www.quizdiva.net/chinesehoroscopes/dog.gif'> color='#000000'>You are totally loyal, faithful, and honest.However, you don" face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" a mood! You are most compatible with a Tiger or Horse.

What'>http://www.blogthings.com/whatyearwereyoubornunderquiz/">What Year Were You Born Under?

<><><>You font-size: color:black;>http://www.quizdiva.net/chinesehoroscopes/dog.gif'>color='#000000'>You are totally loyal, faithful, and honest.However, you don" face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" a mood!

Interview Questions for Michelle

1. What is your happiest memory?
2. Why have u decided to go into hygiene?
3. If u could live any were, were would it be? (Other planets are not an option)
4. If u are a loly pop what flavor would u be and why?
5. What is the favorite nick name u have been given in your life.

Answers

Beckie's Questions:

1. Do you ever wish your life had come out a different way?

Well it old have been nice to win the lotto, but other then that I am happy.

2. Will you be disappointed if your bun in the oven turns out to be another boy?

No. I kinda think it is a boy so if it is I get the pleasure of being rite and if it is a girl well then I get what I was trying for. I like being rite :)

3. What do you like the most about your life right now?

I know this is corny, but feeling the baby move. I like living in the moment and not having to stress about tomorrow.

4. What do you regret the most?

Not learning how to spell better. I love spell check, but it takes to much time sometimes. And having morals. Would be so much easer to make it rich if I didn't

5. If you could have one wish granted, what would it be?

To live near my friends and family rather then having them all over the states and have every one finantaly secure so all we have to do is have fun. Screw work.
MEME RULES

Question people: Don't forget to add this to the bottom of your answers:MEME

RULES1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.