Well I guess not

So, today as the c's viseted. Gyro came to eat. He is back in the house. Unfortionatly he ws rubbing all over me. I plan to giv ehim a bath tomarrow, but right now I dont' know if it si hom or somthing he got into. I have a rash every were he tuched me. he happieness of him being home was a saprise to me. I was very happy not having pee on my stuff. Now It has passed and I am jsut itchy. Looks liek I will be fineding a new hom for the little guy any how. I look like a tomato with bumps. This sucks.

End Of the Gyro Saga

So Easter Morning we did our egg thing and hunted for baskets. Made cookies the hole Easter thing. As I Made Breakfast I noticed a bad smell by the figured. Gyro had peed on my counter top. On some important papers and the boys art work there. Yuck.

So I rubbed his nose in it. (yes, I know that doesn't work on cats, but I really more wanted to brake his neck.) I had restraint I think. When I let Gizmo out to potty. Gyro ran out. I let him stay outside while I cooled off and then asked him to come in. He would run away every time. Finlay night came and he still wouldn't' come it so we let him stay out. We haven't seen him sense then. We are told my our neighbors girl he was in there yard, but I don't know. I think if he was near he would respond when we call him like he has done before. Their is another black and white cat the romeos this neighborhood so she may be mistaken. We had an appointment this weak for the vet, but with him missing I guess that is to little to late.

Not to upset he is gone. Nice not to have pee on out things, just wish I could be certain he is in a safe and happy place. Maybe he will still come home. Don't know after three days it is hard to believe he will.

To me at 15

OK so it took me a few days.

To me at 15.

Don't date that ass Joey. You deserve better.

Don't sleep around. It makes u feel bad and again u deserve better.

Hug your Grandma more and visit her more. U will Miss her more then u know.

Don't beleave everything your mom tells u. Your sister wants to see u as much as u want to see her.

Treet your friends better. They are the once who will be around after asshole cheats on u.

Exept your dad trying to be a dad. Give him a chance he loves u.

Last. You are a good, funny, loving, person don't beleave any one who tells u diffrent. Even yourself.

I tag Michelle and Beckie. What would u tell your 15 year old self?

Back Pepper

You Are Black Pepper

You may be considered ordinary by some, but you're far from boring. You elevate the mood of any discussion, and people miss you when you're not around. You are secretly very dominant and powerful. Most can only take you in small doses.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatspiceareyouquiz/">What Spice Are You?

One Fine Day

Today was reword day for all the hard work the kids have been doing for the math-o-thon. B girl was so sweet when I told her Trevor and Devon didn't do much math because they finished there assignments for the year. She said "That still counts because they worked really hard" Such a sweaty.

We meant with the C's and little French Fries to see The Golden Campus. Think Mrs. L had the right idea hiding in the mall :) the movie was good, but very loud. Think it shook up the kids more the expected. Nathen was a pistil. He would get riled up by the fight seens then not want to watch the rest. Was quit interesting to say the least. Think it will be some time before I take him to a movie again. After we let he kids run out some of there sugar. I thought for two min about going to the vegi store near by. Realized we have no money for that and took the boys home. Then as thier hunger struck I thought I should have asked if they all wanted to go to lunch. Never think of thous thing at the right time. So we stopped at BK for some not healthy food and off to home.

Calling my sister back when I got home. Brian's doctors are looking more positive for his recovery. The CT scan shows good brain activity and they cut down on his octagon and he is breathing some on his own now. They lowered his meds in hopes he would wake up, but nothing so far. Scheduled his surgery next weak on his face and brain. Now he just needs to wake up. I am hopeful for good news soon.

All in all a good day.

Math-a-Thon

SO we are all set. the boys are in there last two weeks of WAVA math and what a better way to celebrate then to join friends in a math-a-thon. What a great idia Niki. I just have to hit my head agents the wall a few times realizing after I told them that the 7Th is on a Friday so we will have to skip the church coop group to go to the movie. Oh well, one day wont kill them. And they so deserve a fun day for all there hard work. So here we go ...

Another day past

This last few weeks have just been a bler. One kid sick after another and then me and James and back again. I am hoping it is out for good. School has been good, tyring to keep the boys moving on phonics so we can move up a grade. I'll probably end up fudging some of it. Seems it would be a shame for them not to move up because of one weak of work not done. Tuesday was nice surprise. I was expecting the worst and should have known better. Having all six kids in the house was really fun. I guess I expected different because well, with just one extra on a normal bases it is quit a different story. My home always looks like a tornado hit when she leaves. But Niki's kids were great. Even picked up without asking. As I said. I don't know why this surprised me they are great kids. Refinanced on Wednesday. I hope it was the right dissuasion. We had to do something. There have been one or two months when all the bills were payed, but nothing left for any thing ells. James's stress seams to have lifted some. And that is a very good thing. I have felt so useless without working these last few weeks. I know $100 a weak isn't much, but it has payed for food. Now it is a very unreliable income and I am about to drop the hole thing. I hate not knowing when or if I am watching Shelby at any time. I can't make plains that way. I have mixed feelings on that one so I am just letting it go as is for now. Tomorrow we start back at the church. I am exited. I have missed hanging with the ladies and the kids and I have been cooped up sick and can use getting out of the house. Plus I can get my baby fix :) And that is all for now.

OH the eclipse was sooo cool. Noon of my pic's came out tho.

Renaissance Feast

What a long but fun day. Starting at 6:30am to 11:30pm with prep and clean up bouth at the church and home. It was so worth it.

Our Homeschool Groop

Trevor and Devon

My Knights in shinning armer

Black Plag Candy Land

Sord Play

Showing off for Daddy

Let it Snow

We finally got some. Already melting, but we had some fun this morning

I don't think Nathen could bend his arms

Damn

I had pics of home school fun today. Rock tumbling, banana much stuff, the kids had a blast. And my computer deleted them all I can't fined them anywhere. Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn Damn!!!

First time or everything

So today I leaped out of my comfort zone and went to the Friday Coop at the Real life family Center. It terned out to be allot of fun. The boys get to learn history from the Story of History and have fun making art. I think is supposed to relate some how. They get to use there lunch box and play games outside weather pyramiding while I cuddle with baby's in the nursery :)

Cleand out

Cleand out

Been cleaning all day. After each of us took terned being sick this last weak our house needed a purging. The Tree is down decoration is boxed and stored. Even went threw the cuberts and sorted the good from the bad. Still have to fold clothes, but then I always have to fold clothes. They are clean witch is a good start to that. With 2007 in our whack I guess I just needed a clean slate.

The boys have pledged to clean some times without me asking (they did clean there room today) I am so proud.

James has pledged to be nicer to people and try to be less critical. He also wants to loose weight. I don't know what brought on the nice thing, but it couldn't hurt.

As for me I will be nicer to myself. I just can't keep running this way. So I cleaned and feel good about my home and to tired to feel bad about anything ells for now.

Better late then Never

With the get together tomarrow I figerd I should really get these up. It was very stresful to have Mellissa over and the kids, but some how I didn't kill any one by food poisaning or other meens on hand.

Don't they look happy

Finaly get to open this thing then they make him look at the card

What it is all about

One for Great Grandma

One extra Presant this year

Tomarrow is the last day of the year. Plan to see it out with a smile.

Happy New Year

Silent Night

The kids are sleeping. Been sitting drinking coco and reading by the Christmas Tree. Sees like yesterday we were in the yard playing in the sprinkler. Just feeling hopeful and helpless all at the same time. The Weather is cold and wet and I have been wishing for snow. But then I hate driving in snow so maybe not. It has been such an odd year. I wonder what the new one has in store.

To good to be true

It lasted six days. eather I wasn't home or she wasn't home or James was here to take the brunt. Well, he is at work and she is here. I have to bake for tomarrows Family lunch and so am stuck with her. If I make it to the end of the day before kicking her out it will be a maricle. I even bitched on CTT, but I am still mad. What rite does she have?

Heres the story

I just can't tack another day of this shit. DS1 is chewing on a paper clip. I ask him to put it away and a fit starts. I place him in time out, but he is full of spit and fire so I have him hold his arms above his head. This is a step proseder. if he cooled down he wouldn't have his hands up. It is uncomfertable, but not torcher. Not like I spanked him or hit him. Just told him to hold his hands up. In one min he was colm and out of time out. This is what works for my kids. It dosn't hert them. Trevor and I talk and all is well. Tell MIL pipes up. "Thats child abuse, your an adalt u should know better." This coming from a women who would hit her kids with what ever was at hand at the time. And then she gets on me about how I treat the girl I watch dering the weak as well. Um, I never lay a hand on my kids. If they say there arms hurt I let them rest them. They are never up for more then a min or two. well exept the little girl. SHe can stand there all day. Dosn't seem to bother her. BUt if it gets her to swalow her food and not rot out her teath then I am doing it and her Mom knows that is how we handle things here as well. It is not My MIL fuckingbuissness adn I am tierd of holding my mouth shut. SHe talkes behined my bake about me like I am not going to hear about it. I can take most things, but do not tell me I am hurting my kids. I know my kids I know what they need. If they were starved, black and blue, put down, and treated meen. then open your mouth, but for having him hold his hands up for one min. GO fuck yourself. I am raging rite now. She knows thats the one butten I will not talerat. You do not tell me how to be a parent. I didn't ask.

There has been other stuff, but this one was the kicker. I so want the next two days to be over. I so don't want to be near her and really don't want to go to the family dinner. Great her and my SIL picking on me together. At least they will have fun. I wish I had an excuse to get out of the house. James to be here.

Heart Beat

Silence as I wait for James to come home with a snack. Probably fries. Sitting reading, enjoying the moment. A little drink hitting my head and the light tingle as I feel my heart beat. The neighbors playing music. Mormons they will tern it off soon and put there son and his friend to bed. I can hear my house humm, the dishwasher ticking as it heat dries. And a thumping that can only be discibed as a heart beat. My home pulsing in rhythm and peace. Alive with us resting insides its walls.

Thanksgiving with great friends

OK so finally getting around to putting pic's up. We had a fantastic time. L and her hubby put out a fantastic spread. They make there home so worm and welcoming I didn't want to leave. James wanted me home for some reason though :) The kids got to see the moon in all its glory and we had a great time. I can't remember a better day.

Here is D and Mack chilling after a very filling dinner

Trevor and Devon enjoying tree house fun

L and all her lovelies
Make and her beautiful doughtier
Just the boys hangen
Niki and Fran came over this weakened. We had a blast. Like a secant Thanksgiving. Can't ask for more then good food with good friends. I love these guys.

Ginger Bread House

Last Sunday we were able to make it out to see the family. It was a very nice day. The kids spent most of the time in the yard playing tag then came in for a delicious dinner and

Gingerbread fun.

Even the Daddys got in on the fun

Had to get a pic while they were standing still

Think they ait more then they stuck on the house

isn't it beautiful

every one is sleeping

So it si only 8:30pm. James worked all night adn was up all day with us and is now sleeing. The kids are worn out from swimming at the YMCA and are out cold. It is nice to have time to myself, but really dont' know what to do with it.

I could post pic's from halloween. Still haven't doen that. Or knit the baby blanket for my friend Heather who just had her fifth baby. Calob. He is so cute and I really do nead to do that. Just not up to doing anything. Probably grab some candey and veg infront of the TV.

Been wondering when I lost who I was. I used to like things and now it is all about the kids and James. Been isalating myself again too. I keep wanting to call peaple and then don't. I should have goen to the CoOp today. I was just so tierd. Frirday is the only day I have nothing to do and no were to go. I kinda like that.

Oh well going to go veg. Tomarrow is gymnastics so that should be fun.

Just checking in

Noteced it has been some time. Been bizzy kinda, but nuthing note worthy. Halloween has come and goen. That was fun. Niki, Fran and theh kids staied over. Made it all the more exiting and fun for the kids.

James is working alot, but loks like he will be home for a few days. Things always slow down on weak days.

Nathen is going threw a grouth spert and is tierd an cranky, but I can't seem to get him to sleep more then an hour at a time. Leaving me tierd and cranky too.

Boys are having fun with schoole, just wish there were more good days. Maybe there are just to tierd to notes them.

(yes I know spelling sucks and so does typing, but on handed u get what u get)

Boys are starting a new CoOp on friday. I am a bit reluctant. We have so much on our plates as it is, but it sounds like fun, so giving it a try. It is religias base Sciance and Histeroy. I really don't know much about it, but figer the boys can't make a good choice on there beleaves if I don't teach them anything. Well, they know basic stuff.

As for me I started taking anti depresants. Mix fealings on that. I know I am manic and my lows are getting harded to get threw. None of my natral stuff seam to cut it any more and this time of year is really hard. Just feel defeated in taking pills. And in some way that my fealings are invaled, becouse they are intensifid by my condition. I onlmost don't want the pills to work. I think they are though. I do have a losse or apitite, but I seem to still keep my temper down even though my suger shoud be way off. And I have had only one angsiaty attace in two weaks. Just hate being on meds. Makes me wearder then I already am.

And thats the scoop. Take care all